was a day unlike any other. I realize I can’t be lax in my pursuit. If I want to excel I have to shoot for the goal with as much velocity as I can get behind me.
Note to some bored person who may read this: this is totally random. Might feel like a ride on a winding track. If you should decide to continue reading, I hope u enjoy the ride.
I went to class early and turned in my essays. To my pleasant surprise, the instructor merely glanced over them! Now I know I need to be more secure of myself and my writing. I can’t stand the idea of not feeling adequate in writing. Primarily because I know it isn’t true. It’s just the pressure of writing for a grade, a certain way, on a certain topic that I did not pick myself. It’s all the silly little rules that seem to box my ideas and squeeze the mobility out of them. I’m such a liberal person…I can hardly bear the notion of restriction on something like writing! My sister brought it to my attention that once I start college, this will only get more intense! More words. More rules. More fckn adherence! Dah well, all I can do is try my very best and hope that works. I’ve read that free writing and journaling helps improve writing skills, so I am aiming to do so from now on. At least for 10-20 mins everyday. Wow my life has become so structured since I started this program. I love it. I want everything to come into balance. Holistic balance. Mind Body Soul Spirit and all that jazzle. Tomorrow and Wednesday I have OPTS o_o I’m trying to remain confident and not panic. I have to score 450 or higher in alll areas. Needless to say, I’m gonna be a praying somebody today and tomorrow! ^.^ I plan on studying a bit tonight. I feel a bit lethargic right now, so I question my ability to retain any information. However, I shoullld try to get some in. I’d completely forgotten how much I love Sinead O’Connor. Totally forgot to the extent of the name! And my dearest Kenny G. God I’m so gay. Lol I should tiddy my room. Make my creative space a little wider. I really wish I had a bigger room. One large enough to hold a couch, lovely little desk near a windo with seats in it, lots of wall space to express myself upon, high ceilings, big closet, ahh dreamy. Un dia ^_^. Ohhh and a studio. My own artistic space for painting, drawing, writing and the like. I’m doing just fine with what I have. Dreaming for more keeps my mind in search of infinity, so yaaaa. I’ve been thinking a lot about playing some instruments, other than guitarrrr! I should try hard to find a job, so I can buy some instruments. Primarily a keyboard (coz I can not afford a baby grand just yet) and Indian flute. I feel like I’m turning inward. Not in an anti-social way, but in a way as to correct and meliorate. I mean it seems so vital to truly lovvve me before I can truly enjoy abundance in love and life and all that it encompasses. I seem to be tiring quickly with these social sites, like downelink and ourchart. Idk why.. just can’t stand being approached with artificial hellos and over exaggerated flattery. I’m just..idk maybe growing up? I dunno..this rambling is quite therapeutic! I’ll do this more often. Yes.
Dreaming keeps me on the border of infinity, action will get me to infinity and beyond. Yes Buzz I will be joining you!